What Is a Flatmate? (And Why Everyone Should Have One)
There is a very good chance that at some point in your life, you will have a flatmate. Living in shared accommodation is a rite of passage for most young adults, and honestly, it is something everyone should experience, for better or worse.
So what does flatmate actually mean?
A flatmate (or housemate) is someone you are not related to but share a home with. Simple as that. In some cases, you and your flatmate are merely ships passing in the night, different schedules, different social circles, the occasional nod in the hallway. But it is not uncommon for a flatmate to become a lifelong friend, and in rare cases, something more. And if you are really unlucky? A sworn enemy and a cautionary tale.
Flatmate, housemate, roommate: what is the difference?
These terms get used interchangeably, but they do have slightly different origins.
Flatmate and housemate are the preferred terms in Australia, New Zealand and the UK. Housemate tends to refer to sharing a house, while flatmate is more associated with apartments or flats, though in practice most people use both without thinking too hard about it.
Roommate (or room-mate) is the American term for essentially the same thing, though it originally referred to sharing an actual room, like in a college dormitory. In the US, roommate is used broadly to describe anyone you share a dwelling with, whether or not you sleep in the same room.
In Australia you might also hear flatties, housemates, or just “the people I live with” depending on how enthusiastic someone is about the arrangement.
Shared living is basically a diplomatic exercise
Sharing a home with flatmates is a bit like squeezing NATO, the United Nations and a strata committee under one roof. It is all about negotiation and compromise, starting with rent.
Most of the time, rent is divided equally. But not always. The person in the bigger room, or the one with the ensuite, or the one who scored what is basically a self-contained granny flat, may be happy to chip in a bit more. Or not. That is where negotiation comes in.
On top of rent, you are also splitting utilities such as electricity, gas and water, and yes, the argument about who takes the longest showers is basically a universal shared living experience.
Then there are the hangers-on: the partners, mates and siblings who seem to have their own place but you would never know it. Do they contribute to the grocery bill? The Wi-Fi? The electricity? These are the small negotiations that define a share house.
Finding the right flatmate
The good news is that, unlike relatives, you actually get to choose who you live with.
When you are looking for a flatmate or for a place to live, the options include asking friends, checking local noticeboards, community groups, or using an online platform like flatmate.com.
Once you have made contact with someone, meet in a public place first. Ask for references. And do not skip the awkward but important conversation about expectations around cleaning, guests, noise and bills, before you sign anything.
Getting the lease right
The safest share accommodation setup is a formal rental through a real estate agent. That way, everyone’s rights are clear from the start, around maintenance, inspections, breaking a lease and everything in between.
If possible, have everyone’s name on the lease. It protects all parties. If someone disappears overnight, you are not necessarily left covering their share of the rent on your own.
The long game
If you choose well and navigate the small stuff reasonably, sharing a home with flatmates can be genuinely great. You might end up with lifelong friends. Or you might just get through the lease and part ways amicably, which is also a perfectly fine outcome.
Either way, shared living is one of those experiences that teaches you a surprising amount about yourself, mostly through arguments about whose turn it is to replace the dishwashing liquid.
- What is the difference between a flatmate and a housemate? In practice, not much. Flatmate tends to be used when sharing an apartment or flat, while housemate usually refers to sharing a house. Most Australians use the two interchangeably, and nobody is going to correct you either way.
- What is a roommate? Roommate is the American version of flatmate or housemate. It originally referred to sharing an actual room (think college dorms), but in the US it is now used to describe anyone you share a home with, regardless of whether you share a bedroom. In Australia, you will rarely hear it outside of American TV shows.
- How do I find a flatmate in Australia, UK, New Zealand? The most common options are word of mouth, social media, and online platforms. flatmate.com lists people looking for accommodation and people with rooms to fill across Australia and New Zealand. It is worth taking your time with this one, finding the right person matters more than finding someone fast.
- What should I look for in a flatmate? Compatible schedules, similar cleanliness standards, and someone who is upfront about their lifestyle. Beyond that, trust your gut. A good interview question: ask them why they are leaving their current place.
- Is it better to have your name on the lease? Generally yes. If your name is on the lease, your rights are clear and protected. If you are subletting from someone else, you are in a greyer area legally. Where possible, have everyone’s names on the lease so no one person carries all the risk.
