It can be difficult to overcome the feeling of losing a flatmate. Living with someone for a period of time means that you have gotten used to a certain lifestyle with them. Besides fitting in together, you have also made a connection and most likely became friends during the time you spent together. That person knows you, your habits, what you like and what you don’t like. This is something you have built for a long time and it can’t be replaced easily. However, moving on is the best way to get over them. You will be okay 🙂 Here are 18 typical stages you have felt or will feel when losing a flatmate.
1. The “I’m moving out” Shock
The first time you receive the news about your roomy moving out, you will feel disappointed and depressed and you might get into an emotional crisis. When you find out that your friend is moving out to live with your boyfriend/girlfriend, or moving to another place because of a new job, you might start evaluating your own life – it can get hard.
2. You question their decision to move out
The next step is anxiety and thinking that you might have done something wrong to make them move out. You doubt their decision and think that they’ve made a huge mistake in deciding to move out.
3. Getting over the old roommate
Time passes and you accept the fact that your roommate has to go on with his life. You finally realize that no mistakes were made on your part and that this is just how life works.
4. Presenting yourself in the best way possible and searching for a new one
And it begins. The search for a new roommate starts. You put a nice looking ad which shows how amazing you are! You are the best roommate ever and people are missing out on a lot by not living with you.
5. Questioning whether the new flatmate will be up to your awesome standards
Once you have explained to the public how great you are, you realise that the person who gets to live with you must also be awesome. This is why certain requirements must be set, so do this as soon as possible.
6. You start to feel anxiety thinking that you won’t be able to find a new flatmate
Be patient. Finding a suitable roommate takes time and it will be a while before people start contacting you. Don’t rush things out of desperation and relax with some TV series while your ad works its magic.
7. Feeling overwhelmed by the amount of applicants
As soon as people find out how awesome you are, they will start rolling in, calling you multiple times per day and asking questions. Having to talk about the same things over and over again every day can be a bother.
8. Narrowing down the applicants
Once you have received enough applications for the spot, you should start comparing the potential roommates and narrow it down to those who seem ok to live with.
Tip: Try comparing the applicants with your old roommate and you will have a much easier job when deciding.
9. It’s time to showcase your apartment
When you choose the most suitable candidates, you should start bringing them in to see the apartment. Make it neat and clean; show that you are a good, caring roommate, and that living with you will be sunshine and rainbows.
10. Feeling the edge when showcasing your apartment
Try to keep it cool when you show your apartment to people. Presenting yourself and your apartment in the best way possible is very important, however, don’t be that creepy person, nobody likes that person – be natural and people will like you for who you are.
11. Feeling overexcited
As I’ve said before, try to be natural and control your emotions. By being overexcited, people will get the feeling that you are some freak who never had a roommate in the first place. Furthermore, they will see you as that “all up in your business” type.
12. The moment of truth: You think you’ve found the right roommate
Not everyone will like what they see when you show them your apartment. This is only natural, even when someone seems completely on board with the idea, he (or she) might never contact you again. Some people will not tell you what they think because they are polite.
13. It’s happening. You think you’ve found the right one
When you find the right person, you will know it. In a moment, everything will just “click” into place and both you and that person will know that you will be great roommates.
14. Time to tell your other flatmates (sneaky text).
If you have other roommates, it is important to talk with them to see if they are on board with your decision. You can invite the candidate to spend some time with your other roommates so that they can get to know each other.
15. First bonding experience
Once your new roommate has moved in, you can organise a party in order to show that he (or she) is welcome. Once the alcohol kicks in, everyone will feel much relaxed and you will get off to a great start.
16. Telling your old flatmate you found a new roommate
Now the time has come to show your old roommate you can live without them! Just kidding, don’t do that 🙂 However, informing them that you found a new flatmate will make your previous roommate happy for you.
17. The rollercoaster is over and let the fun times begin
Now that the roller coaster ride of finding your new flatmate is over, it’s time to settle and enjoy the good times ahead with your new buddy (well, we hope they won’t become a nightmare flatmate).
Which stages do you go through when losing a flatmate? Let us know, we would love to hear from you 🙂
(Header Image: credit.com)
